What do you associate with Christmas? What are those truly iconic things we think of when we think of Christmas? Turkey? Stockings? Christmas Trees? Pudding?
Forget all those. There is nothing more festive than a big beard. Ask Santa Claus. He knows.
Oops. Wrong Santa. That’s not festive, it’s just creepy.
That’s better, although he’s looking a little glum. Surely Doctor Who can do better than that, when it comes to a big festive beard?
Well maybe that’s taking things a bit far. Sometimes less is more.
That’s the “why is my chin feeling cold?” style of beard. Of course, there is a reverse of that:
Warm chin, cold cheeks. If you really want to keep warm, there’s always the “Aslan” option:
Although it might pose a problem for hearing what people are saying to you. Those ears are hidden deep. Sometimes we need the Doctor to lead by example:
Or maybe not. Festive, I suppose, but lacking the twinkle in the eye we would associate with Father Christmas.
… and that’s just untidy. You see, the problem is that the Doctor really isn’t a beard man as such. He rarely sports a beard.
That’s why he doesn’t count the War Doctor as one of his regenerations. It’s the facial hair. There’s something a bit too Masterly about that.
“Rubbish Beard” #1
“Rubbish Beard” #2
“Rubbish Beard” #3
Rubbish Beard #4. Neatness. Cold cheeks to match a cold heart. That’s the Master’s style. But when he adopts a disguise it’s a chance to let loose and go with a more festive option:
You know your beard is too big when it wanders off out of the bottom of the TV screen. In fact, beards in Doctor Who can be quite a useful indication of sanity. The bigger they are, the crazier the character.
Beard Insanity Level 1: obsessed with his work.
Beard Insanity Level 2: unhinged scientist.
Beard Insanity Level 3: has an urge to drink blood.
Beard Insanity Level 4: Varoooooooooonik!
Sometimes an intervention is necessary.
So let’s all raise a glass to festive beards at Christmas. A Merry Christmas to all of you at home!